Mrs. Fry's Diary

By Stephen Fry

Stephen Fry's mystery spouse speaks out at last...

"Enjoyed a pleasant cuppa this morning with a HobNob and Jeremy Kyle. there has been a lady on there who'd been married sixteen years with out realising her husband was once homosexual. amazing! Which jogs my memory, it's our sixteenth anniversary in a couple of weeks. What a coincidence."

Stephen Fry - actor, author, raconteur and wit. Cerebral and complicated, a real renaissance guy. Or is he?

Finally, his mystery double existence - the womanizing, the window-cleaning, the kebabs, the karaoke - is completely printed by means of Edna, his dedicated spouse and mom of his 5, six or probably seven little ones.

These diaries take us via a yr within the lifetime of an unwitting megastar spouse, and are rumoured to incorporate: - scandalous nocturnal shenanigans - recommendation on childcare - a hundred and one activities with a tin of junk mail.

'A strong diary could be like an excellent husband - a relentless spouse, a resource of concept and, preferably, certain in leather.' - Edna Fry

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20 Tuesday The carollers got here around back this night. nonetheless a section too early, in my publication. I instructed them that they need to come again whilst they have controlled to excellent all of the harmonies. And that it truly is nonetheless no longer 'lords a-laying'. 21 Wednesday Brangelina got here taking pictures domestic from institution this day. She could not wait to inform us the scoop. it seems that her classmate, Britnee, had slightly an twist of fate throughout the costume practice session. anything to do with a runaway truck - i did not really seize the entire info. besides, to chop a protracted tale brief, my little lady could be enjoying the total of the Virgin Mary the next day evening! feels like we have one other thespian within the relatives! 22 Thursday all of us went alongside to observe Brangelina within the institution nativity this night. Mr deClarkson greeted the entire mom and dad on the front to the college corridor. It used to be gorgeous he'd taken the difficulty to recollect our names - we have been the single mom and dad to were afforded such an honour, from what i'll inform - even if i have to say his handshake appeared a little less guaranteed than the final time we met and there has been a bit extra saliva on his chin than I take into accout there being prior to. The nativity set was once very remarkable - leave out Campbell had in actual fact long gone to loads of difficulty to make it as real as attainable. even if i need to say i assumed the entire crucifixes have been in all likelihood a slightly at the anachronistic aspect. i did not point out it to her as she appeared fairly fraught because it was once. i do not think it may be effortless establishing a functionality with excitable little angels like my Brangelina. all of it went rather well till the ultimate scene while leave out Campbell attempted at hand Brangelina the child Jesus - performed, as ever, via Sharon Reynolds' Little omit Poopy Pee-pee wrapped in a puppy blanket. rather than taking it and making a song 'When a toddler Is Born', Brangelina simply stared wide-eyed on the little doll. Then all hell broke unfastened. The home windows blew in, thunder cracked and Carmina Burana blasted out from the loudspeakers. The viewers fled in terror and omit Campbell cowered at the back of a kid's Bible. i believe, in retrospect, Mr deClarkson most likely regretted determining Stephen to guy the sunshine and sound method, even supposing we did all benefit from the lighting tricks drastically, as soon as we might got rid of the shards of glass from our hair. regardless of the novel finishing, and fairly lowered viewers, Mr deClarkson proceeded to offer a brief speech thanking the youngsters and employees for all their efforts. We have been a bit stunned that he selected to provide the speech in Swahili and that the bouquet he accordingly provided to overlook Campbell comprised a dozen sticks of rhubarb instead of the extra conventional roses, yet i assume it is the idea that counts. 23 Friday final day of faculty prior to Christmas, so the children have been allowed to absorb their toys. So great to determine Mr deClarkson becoming a member of in too, even to the level of getting an exceptionally reasonable tantrum and biting one of many yr 3 boys while he refused to enable him play together with his glow-in-the-dark Buzz Lightyear. regrettably, the joys and video games have been reduce brief whilst the college closed early in order that police may possibly seal off the realm and try to speak down a guy at the roof together with his underpants at the outdoor of his trousers and his fingers aloft, shouting 'Super-head!

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